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His name is Bill, golf puts him in an good mood

October 2006, around 7.32pm… Three of Bill’s four twenty-something children are busy preparing his Father’s Day dinner in the family’s large, well-equipped kitchen. His only daughter is boiling potatoes. His youngest son is grilling slabs of expensive-cut meat. His second youngest son is preparing a bread and butter pudding. 

Bill breezes in to greet the well-dressed brood. He is in an exceptionally good mood. Tomorrow he will be on a flight heading towards the United States to participate in a four-day long Californian golfing tournament with a good golfing friend and two younger semi-professionals. 

The good mood is aided by the confident knowledge that his team has a good chance of winning against the other 100-plus competing teams. His handicap is commendable, built through many hours spent on the Mornington Peninsula’s greens with his good golfing friend.

With a medicine bag in-hand, Bill’s blonde and cheeky wife heads to a kitchen cupboard in search of his sleeping pills. “Has anyone seen my iPod?” Bill asks as his wife scoots by, and then convinces the youngest son to update the iPod with appropriate long-distance travel music.

The three children good-naturedly roll their eyes as Bill begins to re-outlines the golfing itinerary for tonight’s new dinner guest. Following the four-day tournament, Bill and Co will visit an exclusive invitation-only course set majestically Cliffside on a small island.

Bill brings two bottles of extreme vintage red wine to the table, and golf-talk continues.

After pudding Bill brings out the bag containing the team-branded uniform. Taking his place back at the head of the long dining room table he holds up the pink t-shirt, then the white, followed by the pale blue and the black. There are two pairs of shorts – both deemed fashionable by the two young sons. And the cap fits his generous head.

It is decided that the black should be worn on the first day, the white on the second, the blue on the third, and the pink on the final day. Bill, Father’s Day happy, bundles the golf uniform back into the bag and dinner comes slowly to an end.

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